The Hoodwitch: Witch tips + Horoscopes 5/24-30/2017

Witch Tips


Written By Jessica Lanyadoo

Get ready to get back at it, Puppies! There’s so much going on this week that you need to stay clear about what you really want, or you’ll end up fighting just because you don’t wanna lose. It’s not enough to be ambitious, you’ve got to want the right things. Don’t let your feels trip you up so much that you act out of blind reactive defensiveness, no matter how strong they are.

The New Moon in inquisitive Gemini on the 25th should be a lighthearted time where of seeking new beginnings and opportunities. The trouble is that  tender Venus obsessive Pluto will be squaring obsessive Pluto at the same time. ‘Squares’ in astrology offer potentially creative upsets; these can end up making you feel like you’re being attacked, or like your circumstances are just challenging enough for you to finally get it. When Pluto and Venus square off you’re on the hook to honor your own values. You’re likely to feel obsessive, compulsive, or straight up persecuted around this day, but that doesn’t mean that things are actually that dire. This is a good time to notice the difference between a trigger (something that sets off old feels), and a trauma (a current event that is destructively harmful). Sometimes the very thing we most need is kinda painful, so be brave enough to confront your sad or bad feelings, to better understand their contents. Relationships will be transformed consciously or unconsciously – so stay woke to the events of your life this week! Be especially on the lookout to matters related to love, money, and diplomacy. As the old adage goes: “It’s better to have loved and lost than to live with a jerk for the rest of your life”. Be willing to let go of what no longer serves you, puppies.


On the 28th self obsessed Mars will sit opposite taskmaster Saturn, and let me tell you that this does not bode well for those of you who try to wait out the stressors that pop up early on in the week. This energy is a total boner killer; Mars wants to get things done, and Saturn is all about checks and balances. Watch out for road rage, really dark and brooding feelings, and generally feeling stymied around this time. It’s a great time to edit, or to study something really hard, but a bad time for getting quick results.

Being a person can be hard. Sometimes you’re on top, and sometimes you can’t catch a break. The trick is to not get so twisted up with the bad stuff or indulgent with the awesome bits that you lose track of your self. Rise to the occasion, lovers. Be your best self now, especially when it seems easiest not to.



March 21-April 19

Watch yourself, Aries, because this week will bring you lots of opportunities to act out if you're not careful. When someone goes low, do you go high, or do you get down in the dirt with them? Breathe through your reactions to other people, and seek grace when you’d rather fight yourself, them, or your environment. You can’t always get what you want, anymore than you can control what you feel. Strive to act with patience for your own process as your emotions run high.



April 20-May 20

What you care about requires regular maintenance. If you don’t tend to things, you’ll find that life has a funny way of drawing your attention to them. It’s time to examine the dark side of your desires, Taurus. Every light casts a shadow, and while you don’t need to fear it, you do need to understand it. Get real honest about the stuff you’ve been repressing or denying; it’s time to deal with the complicated stuff, or you may find that it bites you in your sweet hiney, my love.



May 21-June 21

It’s your time of the year, Gemini; the Moon and Sun are both in your sign – ain’t it divine? This week you can expect some delays or setbacks that have you questioning what you’re doing and why. Questioning is good, but self-doubt is a big no-no. Likewise, guilt is a self-obsession that you can do without; strive to have humility in all that you do. The only way to have a true waste of your time is if you don’t learn anything. Stay open and inquisitive, even when things get rough, Twin Star.




June 22-July 22

When things get intense this week (and that they will), you can either react to your feels and blindly defend yourself, or get real about your situation. How you participate in your relationships reflects on you. Who you chose to trust in reflects on you, too. You don’t need to understand why you are at this moment – all you need to do is step forward with your best self. Any love that requires you to be self-destructive is not the love for you, Moonchild.




July 23-Aug. 22

The cost of following your fear is too damn high. When you feel lost or confused, it’s easiest to succumb to your anxieties because they tend to scream the loudest. It’s important that you remember that they’re not your truest instincts, even if they’re the easiest to locate. This week you’re on call to make a leap of faith. Invest in relationships that support and nurture you, not the ones that make life harder to bear. A dynamic doesn’t have to be heavy to be deep, my love.




Aug. 23-Sept. 22

You need to be willing to work in order to get where you want to go. This week will present you with problems to solve, but the deepest issues that are running game on you are inner issues, my love. Look for evidence of self-sabotage in how you respond to stressors this week. Your insecurities have an ironclad defense, but that doesn’t make them right. Risk the exposure of your vulnerabilities, and take heartfelt risks, Virgo. You deserve the very best.



Sept. 23-Oct. 22

Your relationships are likely to be pretty intense this week, Libra. The worst thing that you can do is try to placate the very real problems that come up. Take as much time as you need to figure out how you’re feeling and what you need – just make sure to communicate it clearly if you need space. Ghosting on people is just as bad as yelling at them, so make sure that you aren’t doing either of those things. Show up with honesty, and do the work that your relationships need for the long haul.



Oct. 23-Nov. 21

Things can’t be what you’d prefer all the time, and while that’s unlikely to be a revelation to you, it doesn’t mean that you’ve acknowledged it. Practice acceptance this week, even about the things you want to change. Acceptance isn’t consent; it’s self-awareness. The way to make the changes you most need in your life is to start from a foundation of self-respect and love. You’re going places, and there’s no reason to bring your old baggage with you.



Nov. 22-Dec. 21

Your fears bark way worse than they bite. You have so much to do, and you kinda don’t have time to get lost in your worries. The best course to take is this: don’t weave a narrative to match your feels, no matter how true and compelling your storytelling skills are. You don’t ‘know’ what will happen next or what others are thinking. Its tempting to make sense of things when you feel out of control, but you shouldn’t do it at the expense of the truth; let things unfold this week.




Dec. 22-Jan. 19

It doesn’t matter if you’re right; if you handle yourself in ways that alienate others, nobody will hear what you have to say. There’s what you want to get off your chest, and then there’s what you want the other person to hear, and they are often two different things. “That made me feel bad” is easier to hear than “let me tell you what you did wrong.” Refine how you communicate when you feel righteous, Cappy, or you risk making things worse.




Jan. 20-Feb. 18

If you’ve been holding yourself together with tape and pushing yourself to your limits, this week may be a bit of a breaking point. You’re not supposed to go very far in the wrong direction, and that’s why the Universe loves to kick you in the behind when you’re doing it. Ask yourself if the goals you’re working towards and the methods you’re using are still right for you, Aquarius. Minor adjustments will make major improvements this week.



Feb. 19-March 20

The tension between what you want to do and what you have to do is a kick in the pants these days. There is no hard and fast rule for having balance between your personal and objective goals, but it never hurts to slow down and listen to yourself, Pisces. Honor your feels, even if you don’t have time to indulge them. Don’t abandon or bully yourself in order to get the job done, even if it seems like that would be easier. It takes just as much time to think positive as it does to berate yourself.