In erotic astrology as in many relationships, a secret third entity influences the partnership for good or ill. Sometimes, that entity is your own awakening. Other times, it’s repressed rage or wild sexuality, desperately seeking acknowledgement. Occasionally, it’s a side chick. For our purposes, that entity is named Lilith.
WHAT IS LILITH?
There are multiple Liliths in astrology, but the one we are talking about is named Dark Moon Lilith. It’s a mathematical point that’s exactly in between the earth and the moon -- essentially, empty space. It represents the cosmic void, that very energy this spirit embodies.
Don’t know what your Lilith sign is? Find yours using an online chart calculator like this one. Most astrology calculators will add it automatically, but if it doesn’t there is usually a button you can click. Her symbol is a crescent moon glyph with a cross on the bottom.
WHO IS LILITH?
Above all, Lilith may be the most deeply misunderstood figure in all of astrology. Her story has been exploited to suit the Lululemon spiritual agenda and incorrectly quoted. Even the most common image used to depict her has been proved to a different deity due to an outdated translation of the Epic of Gilgamesh, but mystics haven’t caught up. To their credit, it’s probably because we don’t have all that much to go on. She’s mysterious, and references to her are cryptic and sparse.
Modern New Age lore tends to focus strictly on Lilith’s positive characteristics, largely ignoring what facts we do have. Here’s what we know: Lilith was a Jewish demon before being syncretized as a goddess. She’s named in the book of Isaiah and the Dead Sea Scrolls among “destroying angels”, “spirits of the bastards”, and “goat-demons”. Why was she so reviled? Jewish tradition holds that Lilith was Adam’s first wife before Eve. When she asked to take the dominant role in sex -- a.k.a. do anything besides missionary -- she was cast out of of Eden for upsetting the power dynamic.
In the same way, her astrological energy is that of disruption. She’s the sexuality that we as women are told to hide, and the anger we’re told is too much to show in public. She’s the overwhelming lust that comes on without warning.
In very early Judaism, rabbis also assigned Lilith a host of other uncomfortable associations and warned women against them, including the following: abortion, growing long hair, and sitting down to pee (yes, really). Nocturnal emissions also fell under her domain, so it’s also probably safe to say that self-love is her thing too. On the other hand, she could also be invoked for protection -- Jewish incantation bowls that were buried upside down in houses to trap demons and protect the home were painted with her likeness.
Curiously, Lilith was later subsumed into the Greco-Roman pantheon as part of the Lamia, a group of female vampiric demons named for the sinister Queen Lamia. (Google her story -- it’s juicy.) Others believed her to be the daughter of Hecate, the goddess of witchcraft; she’s also associated with magick in modern witchcraft.
HOW TO WORK WITH LILITH
On a personal level, Lilith loves to provoke. Call on her energy when you want to spice up a conversation, for better or for worse. People with a fierce sense of humor will often have a strong Lilith in their chart; for example, Joan Rivers, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, and Lena Dunham all have potent Lilith placements. Their biting wit has altered women’s role in comedy, but it hasn’t been without resistance from those who prefer the status quo.
You can also invoke Lilith for visionary creative inspiration. Countless avant-garde thinkers whose ideas were far ahead of their zeitgeist -- including Pablo Picasso, Stanley Kubrick, and Kanye West -- were and still are buoyed by planetary connections to the goddess. Even Albert Einstein and Malcom X had this energy prominently placed in their charts. Still, Lilith can disrupt the artist’s connection to everyday reality, leading to the upside-down sensibility found in the works of Lewis Carroll, Ursula Le Guin, and Phillip K. Dick. Think of it like this: if Neptune is a strong drink, then Lilith is a hallucinogen.
Lilith is best known for her role as the sexual liberator. Call upon her to release your kundalini energy, but be ready for what comes afterwards. Our culture’s most iconic sexual muses all have Lilith’s intense allure in their chart signature from Marilyn Monroe and Rita Hayworth to Kim Kardashian and Nicki Minaj. People who challenge sexual norms are also under Lilith’s patronage; LGBTQIA+ icons Neil Patrick Harris, Ian McKellen, and Jennifer Jason Leigh are under Lilith’s influence as well.
In relationships, Lilith draws partners or groups of people together that have serious karma to work out. These are soulmate connections, but know that not all soulmate relationships have happy endings. When strong Lilith people come together, it’s to spur each other to greater heights, no matter the cost. Both passions and emotions will be intense. Pay attention to what that relationship may be trying to teach you, because the sooner you can recognize it, the sooner any disruption to your life will subside.
Famous Lilith relationships include:
Prince William, Duke of Cambridge & Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge
Kylie Jenner, Kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, Kris Jenner & Kanye West
Justin Timberlake & Jessica Biel
Johnny Depp, Vanessa Paradis, Lily-Rose Depp, Winona Ryder & Amber Heard
George Clooney & Amal Clooney
Venus Williams & Serena Williams
Beyonce Knowles & Serena Williams
Tina Fey & Amy Poehler
Taylor Swift & Tom Hiddleston
YOUR LILITH SIGN
Your Lilith sign illuminates the dark side of your sexuality. It’s the wild sexuality that you’re afraid to express, that makes you feel vulnerable and empowered all at once. This sign is also what comes out once things go bad. Do everything you can to express this energy in a positive way, because Lilith can be destructive if not properly channeled.
Knowing your partner’s Lilith sign will reveal their secret desires and potential sexual hang-ups. This is where everyone’s fetishes, kinks, and fantasies originate. Who knew they could be so freaky? It’s also a good idea to keep their Lilith sign in mind if sh*t starts to hit the fan. As the saying goes, “an ounce of preparation is worth a pound of cure”.
Note: Ladies & Gentlemen in order of their Lilith, starting with Lauryn Hill & Lebron James (Lilith in Aries) and ending with Robert Plant & Rashida Jones (Lilith in Pisces).
By order of Lilith sign: Lauryn Hill, Léa Seydoux, Lena Dunham, Anjelica Huston, Marilyn Monroe, Kylie Jenner, Kim Kardashian, Beyoncé Knowles & Serena Williams, Nicki Minaj, Sarah Jessica Parker, Willow Smith, Rashida Jones.
By order of Lilith sign: Lebron James, Kanye West, Drake, RuPaul, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Jeff Goldblum, Tom Hiddleston, The Weeknd, Lenny Kravitz, Bryan Cranston, Salvador Dali, Robert Plant.
LILITH IN ARIES
In Aries, Lilith embodies the spirit of competition. She’s politically active, channeling her rage into action that supports independence of spirit and letting her voice be heard around the world. Lilith in Aries desires complete domination over her haters, no matter what the arena (case in point, Lebron James). If her fierce temper doesn’t have a suitable outlet, it can disrupt the lives of those around her.
LILITH IN TAURUS
Lilith in Taurus embodies the spirit of lust. Whether it’s for sex, money, or power, avarice is a spiritual practice for those with this placement. Allowing yourself to want whatever it is what you want makes you feel grounded and secure. You’re naturally desirous, and when those needs aren’t fulfilled, you’re capable of emotional outbursts worthy of Kanye West himself.
LILITH IN GEMINI
Feline curiosity is at once the Lilith in Gemini’s greatest strength and weakness. You’re mentally voracious, and never one to shut yourself off from any manner of experience. Lilith in Gemini will try anything once, as there’s a good story to tell afterwards. If there was to be a problem here, it’s that the omnivore in you will inevitably get a taste of something that’s not as sweet as you’d hoped. Will it be worth it?
LILITH IN CANCER
In Cancer, Lilith struggles to reconcile the feminine-as-nurturer dynamic with the all-consuming seductress energy that is her essence. It’s a weird combination, but one that works. Consider dark mother goddess Kali Ma, or Anjelica Huston, who plays modern dark matriarch Mortitica Adaams. Your potential downfall? Caring for others who don’t care for you.
LILITH IN LEO
Lilith in Leo embodies the spirit of pride. At their best, they exude a golden aura that mesmerizes those around them. They have an otherworldly charm that they can use -- or manipulate -- to their advantage, especially on stage. When channelled negatively, pride turns to vanity and these individuals seek only to magnify themselves. Their ability to glamour is just that: an illusion.
LILITH IN VIRGO
In Virgo, Lilith is the embodiment of envy. These people take Virgo’s obsession with perfection to new heights, often making them a study in beauty and achievement. No wrinkle is left unsmoothed, no detail unedited. If there was to be a problem here, it would be allowing a hypercritical inner monologue to sabotage their potentially fragile self-esteem.
LILITH IN LIBRA
In Libra, Lilith struggles to reconcile the feminine-as-partner dynamic with the independent demoness energy that defines her. Together they manifest as the “perfect specimen”, both desirable as a mate but individuated enough still maintain some mystery. Alternately, this can play out in various other sordid scenarios. Even though you may romanticize the idea, don’t lose yourself in these kind of relationships.
LILITH IN SCORPIO
Lilith doesn’t have an official ruling sign, but many astrologer suggest Scorpio as her ruler, given the sign’s association with sex, death, and other taboos. Lilith does feel at home here, with amplified powers of seduction, business acumen, and psychic connection. What more can you ask for, really? The only caution here is: use your powers wisely. Don’t strike out unnecessarily, because karma may be less than kind.
LILITH IN SAGITTARIUS
In Sagittarius, Lilith seeks glory. Whether it’s the most exotic vacation or the wildest party, Lilith in Sagittarius with go to great lengths to ensure that all eyes will be on them. They’re entertainers by nature, and aren’t afraid of rock-and-roll excess. The difficulty comes when this Lilith is forced to deal with mundane concerns or the feelings of others. The truth can hurt.
LILITH IN CAPRICORN
In Capricorn, Lilith embodies the spirit of greed. Capricorn thrives on business success and social status, and with Lilith here, the thirst for both becomes insatiable. It’s an impressive driver for “Started From The Bottom” style accomplishments, but it’s not as practical as it may seem. Whether it’s in the bedroom or the boardroom, this Lilith is always looking for an investment piece.
LILITH IN AQUARIUS
In Aquarius, Lilith is the embodiment of rebellion. Conventional notions of sexuality and romance bore them. At best, Lilith in Aquarius inspires artists, politicians, and visionaries far beyond their time. Their hopes, dreams, and desires are completely out-of-this-world -- so much so that many of their worldly companions find them distant or alien. Are they walk-ins? You decide.
LILITH IN PISCES
Reverie becomes the Lilith in Pisces, so much so that they can lose themselves in daydreams and never find their way back. They much prefer fantasy to reality, but only because they want to be surrounded by beauty. Some try to escape the harshness of the present via substances, but if they avoid this, they can be gifted empaths, healers, poets, and artists.